Spoiled Dog? Why Freedom Should Be Earned, Not Given

Weve all seen it or lived it. The dog who barks for attention, bolts through doorways, or insists on sleeping anywhere but their own bed. And while some might smile and call that cute, heres the truth: aspoiled dogisnt a happy dog. Its usually a stressed one.

Lets dive into what spoiling really means, why it leads to impulsive dog behavior, and what you can start doing today to build a more balanced, respectful relationship with your dog.

Spoiled Isnt About Love, Its About Lack of Structure

You can love your dog with your whole heart and still raise them right. But spoiling happens when affection replaces leadership. When a dog gets too much freedom, too many choices, and too little guidance, chaos follows.

In my world, a spoiled dog is one who:

• Makes most of the decisions in the home
• Is given affection without boundaries
• Gets freedom they havent earned
• Lacks consistent structure and expectations

This creates confusion. And confusion creates stress. Spoiling isnt about too much love. Its about too little leadership.

Maturity Isnt About Age

Dog owners often say, But hes two! Shouldnt he know better by now?

Lets clear this up:dog maturity vs ageare not the same thing. Maturity isnt automatic. Its the result of structure, repetition, and leadership. Ive met five-month-old pups with more impulse control than six-year-old dogs.

Impulsive dog behaviordoesnt disappear with ageit disappears with training. Just like with kids, dogs need guidance, not guesswork. And that guidance has to be earned with consistency, not assumed by age.

Why Too Much Freedom Feels Like Pressure

One of the biggest misconceptions I see is the belief that freedom = happiness. But for many dogs,freedom too soon equals stress.

Picture this: a dog with full access to windows, open doors, unsupervised house privileges. It looks dreamy from the outside. But inside? That dog is managing too much. Barking at every passerby. Following every noise. Feeling the weight of control they werent meant to carry.

Without structure, your dog will fill in the gapsand usually not in a way that works well for either of you.

Structure Builds Calm and Clarity

Structure isnt punishmentits permission. It gives your dog the safety of knowing what comes next and how to succeed.

Thats why Im a huge advocate of crate training. Not because dogs should be confined foreverbut because thedog crate training benefitsare real:

• Builds impulse control
• Supports potty training
• Helps regulate overstimulation
• Creates a safe space for rest

Crate time isnt a timeout. Its a security blanket for a dog thats still learning. Just like you wouldnt leave a toddler alone in the house, dont leave a young or under-trained dog to figure it out.

Freedom Is a Paycheck

Think of freedom as your dogs paycheck. Its earnednot handed out because theyre cute.

Off-leash privileges? Earned. Roaming the house while youre gone? Earned. Greeting guests calmly without a leash? Earned.

Every dog can earn those things in time. But giving freedom before a dog is ready sets them up to failand erodes your leadership in the process.

A Real-Life Reminder: Milas Story

One of my favorite clients, Mila, was a total rockstar. Obedient. Polite. Practically passed the AKC Canine Good Citizen test in her sleep. Her family decided to give her full access to the house while they were away.

Within days? Accidents. Out of nowhere. Quiet, subtle stress manifested in the only way she knew howby peeing inside.

The solution wasnt more potty breaks. It wasmore structure. Once her family brought the crate back during alone-time, the accidents disappeared. Because Mila didnt need more spaceshe needed more clarity.

What You Can Start Today

If your dog is showing signs of being spoileddont panic. And dont blame yourself. Just start here:

• Clip the leash on inside. Yes, even in the house.
• Reinforce boundaries with baby gates or Place commands.
• Reward calm behavior. Interrupt chaos.
• Reinstate crate time for rest and reset.

The goal? Small, daily wins. These rituals lay the foundation for a calm, confident dog who knows how to handle freedom when it comes.

Inside Alys Academy, Youll Learn the Tools That Make This Possible

Want step-by-step help? InsideAlys Academy, I walk you through exactly how to teach your dog calmness, leash work,Place, and real-life boundaries. From everyday training challenges to mindset shifts, its all there.

And if you want a supportive community to ask questions and get feedback,Alys Insider Communityis full of dog owners on the same journey.

We talk about it allcrate wins, leash struggles, overexcited greetings, and yes, how toun-spoil a spoiled dog.

Final Thought: Love Big. Lead Boldly.

Every dog deserves affection. But they also deserve clarity, structure, and a leader they can trust.

Because heres the truth: aspoiled dogisnt freetheyre stressed. When you show up consistently and lead with calm, your dog doesnt just behave better. They feel better.

Want a calm dog who follows your lead? Dont give them freedom. Help them earn it.

Lets build that calm together.